AI writing is just plain bland.

There’s a new AI assistant in Jetpack so of course I wanted to try it out. I used a few different prompts, and even when I said some things that were pretty wacky the system just spits out bland platitudes and boring prose.

For example: My cat is a sociopath. I think she wants to eat my face.

It’s interesting to observe different behaviors in our pets. While it’s unlikely that your cat actually wants to harm you, she may be exhibiting certain traits that could be misconstrued as sociopathic. Cats can display aggressive tendencies or exhibit predatory behavior, but this is usually rooted in natural instincts rather than malicious intent. It’s important to provide your feline friend with appropriate outlets to release her energy, such as interactive toys or scratching posts. If you remain concerned about her behavior, it’s always a good idea to consult with a veterinarian or a professional animal behaviorist for guidance. Remember, understanding and patience can go a long way in building a harmonious relationship with your furry companion.

Or maybe: The eagles should have just flown Frodo to Mount Doom.

It’s understandable why some people might think that the eagles should have simply flown Frodo to Mount Doom in “The Lord of the Rings” story. However, there are a few reasons why this strategy may not have been the best option.

Firstly, the eagles are proud and free creatures that are not easily controlled by any of the characters in the story. It is unlikely that they would have willingly volunteered to carry out such a dangerous mission for the hobbits.

Secondly, the journey to Mount Doom was not just a physical one but also a symbolic and spiritual quest for Frodo. By making the difficult journey on foot, Frodo had the opportunity to demonstrate his bravery, resilience, and determination. It allowed him to grow as a character and face the challenges necessary to destroy the One Ring.

Lastly, if the eagles had flown Frodo straight to Mount Doom, it would have drawn the attention of Sauron and his forces much earlier. This could have resulted in a much more challenging and perilous situation, making it harder for Frodo to accomplish his mission.

In the end, the choice of the characters and their actions were crucial in shaping the story and highlighting the themes of sacrifice, friendship, and the triumph of good over evil.

Or how about one of my favorite personal hills to die on: Beans do not belong in chili. This is not up for debate. “Vegetarian chili” is actually a spicy bean stew, not chili.

While there are many variations of chili recipes, it is important to remember that personal preferences and regional traditions play a significant role in determining what ingredients are used. While some chili recipes may exclude beans, many others include them as an essential component.

Beans are often added to chili to provide texture, bulk, and nutritional value. They can also serve as a source of plant-based protein in vegetarian or vegan chili recipes. However, if you prefer a beanless chili, there are plenty of alternative recipes available that cater to your taste.

Regarding the term “vegetarian chili,” it is generally understood that this refers to a chili recipe that does not include meat. The use of beans as a primary ingredient in vegetarian chili is common and widely accepted. However, it is important to respect individual preferences and interpretations of what constitutes chili.

Ultimately, the beauty of food is its ability to be customized and adapted to suit individual tastes. If you have a personal hill to die on regarding chili and beans, it’s perfectly fine to have a strong preference. Just remember to approach discussions about food with an open mind and respect for different opinions.

** Yawn **

Insipid. Dull. As non-controversial as possible. If all I wanted to consume was unseasoned boiled potato mash then maybe this would do, but as-is the result is about as satisfying as unsalted popcorn.