It took willpower to create this habit. But maybe I should let it go.

[ update: I made up my mind at the last possible moment. Decision at end of the post. ]

I’ve been trying to decide something. Not anything important, mind you. Something silly and trivial, but it’s vexing me.

I’m trying to decide if I should call it quits on my NY Times Crossword puzzle streak.

I’m up to 499 days in a row doing the NY Times Crossword, most days on my phone. Sometimes (thanks, Pacific time zone!) I can finish the puzzle the day before. That gives me some flexibility if I need to skip a day. But most days, I do the puzzle (for tomorrow) near the end of the day, and it’s a nice respite from other work stuff.

I’m still starting to wonder if this attachment to a puzzle streak is something I want to continue.

One perspective – I’m pretty cross at the NYT of late. Do I want to keep putting my energy into them? Another perspective – it’s only a puzzle, and it often makes me happy when I finish it. So where’s the harm?

500 days in a row feels like a good place to draw the line. Though it also feels arbitrary.

Tonight, I have been putting off the Saturday puzzle, which will be number 500. I know that putting it off is so I can buy some time and make a decision later – I just don’t yet know what that decision will be.

These days, it’s often difficult for me to feel like I’m getting traction or accomplishing things. That’s on the side of me sticking with it. I also don’t like feeling attached to that arbitrary number, though. Count that one on the side of breaking the streak and doing the puzzle whenever I want to.

This should be simpler, but somehow it isn’t. Maybe I will flip a coin tomorrow. Or maybe I’ll just do the damn Sunday crossword.