Looking back.

I started working for Bill in January 1997, so approximately seven years ago. Seven years… That’s a long time. I had worked for LTC since early 1995, and then I moved out of Packaging to work for this guy who, in my experience up to that time, was a total jerk. But it got me out of production, and the guy was overworked (I had personally had to call him at 3AM a few times when I was on third shift), so maybe he would be less of a jerk when he had another set of hands.

That was a rough year.

I met Scott and Jim and Jeff that year — they were our primary hardware vendor. Jeff and I are about the same age. He had worked for the vendor for about a year (maybe?) longer than I worked for Bill. I remember he tried to hire me once, for less than I had made as a production operator. I was a very good production operator, though, and I had a shift differential. At any rate, I didn’t take him up on it. That was a good decision for me, long-term. Not just because of the money, but because of the opportunity. I’ve gotten better, but I certainly was not the person you wanted to put in front of your customer in 1997. Too inexperienced, too overwhelmed. But I got better.

And now look at us. I read Jeff’s blog a few times a week. He’s working in newspaper production, which oddly enough is comfortable and familiar to me after all these years. I haven’t worked in a daily newspaper since 1993, and a lot has changed. A lot stays the same. Jeff was a good guy, but a bit abrasive sometimes — young, cocky, confident. And still, he seemed to me to be like me — desperate to prove himself, misunderstood, with an appropriate amount of self-righteousness thrown into the mix. We’ve lost touch, but at least I can keep up with him from afar.

Scott came to work for us, then years later went to work for some electricity start-up. He’s a big financial uppity-up there, which suits where he felt like he should be. He was so depressed at the p-V… but so were most of us. I don’t blame him for being so despondent, but I do wish he hadn’t acted like such a prick at times. It sometimes made him difficult to work with.

Jim also came to work for us, through LTC and p-V. He’s still there. I wish I had more sympathy, but if you keep doing it to yourself… Of course, the economy there sucks. Maybe he can’t leave, but maybe he just won’t. I don’t know. Not my place to judge him.

And then there’s me. Here I am. Out in foggy California. And (mostly) happy, despite some “I’m not worthy” moments. Truth be told, I fell more worthy than I used to… that’s a good thing, yes?

Anyway, this ramble was sort of a “look how far I’ve come” babble, I guess. I don’t know why it struck me. I guess I just feel like there’s so much distance between that time and now. Some days, it feels farther than others.