Yeah, yeah. I know I said I don’t do NY resolutions (esp not on 1 January). But I’m so inspired by Cate’s 2018 Liberation list! So here’s mine:
- Stop allowing myself to be dragged into conversations I really don’t want to be part of. This usually happens on FB (where else?) and sometimes Slack, and usually goes something like: “Hey I think you should care about X because you’ve had an opinion about this sort of thing in the past. So I summon you to this thread to demand your immediate feedback on Yet Another Awful Thing happening in the world.”
So then there I am. Summoned into a conversation in progress I would have been very happy to skip altogether, often including people I don’t know at all.
- Walk the hell away when I feel myself getting emotionally sucked into shallow dust-ups in tiny 280-character bursts. I let my emotions get whipsawed around by some stupid thing said by someone I don’t know — when I would much rather save that energy to get riled up about truly dangerous shit happening every day instead. All that little bullshit saps away at my energy to stay focused and angry when I need it. I don’t owe my attention to anyone, especially not as audience to every petty fight.
- I’m going to let go half-assing things that I don’t care about enough, just because I don’t want someone else to think badly of me. I still sometimes commit to things I shouldn’t because I really like the person who asks me. In and of itself, that isn’t bad. Favors for people you like and care about can be a great gift, gladly and freely given. But when I over-schedule myself and spend well into my introvert energy reserves for something I deep-down don’t care about… that’s not worth what it costs me. So no more of that. I’ll finish out the ones I already have committed, but I’m not making any more of ’em.
- That voice that tells me it’s unseemly or “seems fake” to be too happy, too excited, too giddy, too proud, too much of a “cheerleader” — always right after I have a moment of joy. I’m not sure I can make that voice go away altogether, but I can stop giving it any sway. That voice doesn’t get a vote anymore. I’m letting that one go.